Saturday, July 17, 2010

Summer Reminders (1)

We have been blessed to spend much time as a family this summer.  And it seems that everytime we get together to have fun, we always have a reminder of Joy.  By reminder of Joy, I mean one of those moments where you see or hear something that reminds you of that member of the family that is missing, but is a source of joy instead of just a pain.  Just one of those moments when, despite your grief, you smile, you remember, you allow yourself to feel the joy you felt before.

The first one of the summer that comes to mind was at Ethan's birthday party.  We had his party at a dock where there is a play ground and a shelter house.  I had found this great balloon at my florists with a puppy and a dragonfly and we got it for Ethan "from Shyla".  We tied it to part of the shelter house and near the end of the party, I untied it and carried it to the playground to take a few shots of Ethan holding his sister's gift.  Then this happened...

It was like it was happening in slow motion.  I felt the ribbon get lighter and looked up just in time to see the bottom of the balloon just slip from the ribbon and out of my reach.  Everyone that saw this begin just watched as I tried to jump and read the drifting gift.  Ethan kept watching for it.  He looked at the sky until we could no longer see the little speck that was his balloon.

I was a little unsure of how he would handle the balloon he had waited all day to play with floating away and out of sight.  I approached him and said, "Ethan, I'm so sorry your balloon floated away.  If you want, Mommy will get you another balloon on Monday."  He just kept looking up at the sky and said nothing.  "Ethan...can you still see it?"  It was I'm sure nothing but a tiny dot in the big blue sky by now.  He looked at me smiling and said, "It's ok Mommy, Shyla wanted to play with it."  He hoped down and went playing on the playground.

For a moment I was not sure how I was going to react.  Tears didn't come.  Nope.  All I could do at that moment was chuckle.  If she would have been there, I'm sure there would have been a battle over who got to hold the balloon in their little hand and who would get to play with it.  She is not here, but it was like they were wanting to play with the same toy and this time, she won!  It just made me laugh a little. 

I still was hurt that I never got a picture of Ethan and his balloon and my sweet hubby knew it.  The following Tuesday at work I recieved a small boquet of flowers with the same blue Happy Birthday Balloon with the puppy and the dragonfly.  Several people at work said, "Oh!  Is it your birthday!?" I had to tell a mini version of what happened at his party. 
When I got to my Mom's house that afternoon to pick Ethan up, I carried the balloon in to surprise him.  He got really excited and said, "Shyla sent my balloon back!  Awww, we sharing!"  This is where it was a little harder to keep my composure...

So that little balloon floating away was the first reminder of joy of summer.  We have had many, many since then (but I have been just terrible at blogging about them) so for the next few weeks, I will try to catch up!

What have been some of your reminders?


michelle hendrix-swords said...

ethan is such a good brother (sharing with syla). i love the moments that i feel true joy again; i'm sure as time goes on there will be more and more though.

Lori said...

I LOVE the "we're sharing!" comment! That just melts my heart!