Let me begin by saying that today was my due date. The original one. My Doc said the 23 after a few ultrasounds, but this is always the day I felt the closest to. I was so excited to see our daughter would be due Thanksgiving Day. Of course I knew she would be scheduled the week before, but just something about this day just really made my heart hover here for the due date.
As this day has gotten closer I have dreaded it. I have mourned it before it was even here, but today, I decided to look at this a different way. BE THANKFUL! Duh, right? It was so obvious! This was her day because I am reminded to be thankful! Thankful in every remembrance of her. Thankful for my pregnancy and for the time I got to share with her. Thankful that I have such a wonderful husband, who just happens to be such a wonderful Father as well. Thankful for such an amazing son. Thankful for such a miracle of a daughter.
So, by now, you are either rejoicing with me or raising your eyebrow in question of how miraculous a baby that does not live and breathe outside her mother's womb can be. Well, I will tell you. She lived, so I live. She lived, so her future siblings can live. She lived so that others could see the power of God's love, JOY and faithfulness in and through our lives. She was a miracle. She is an inspiration. I am inspired to reach out to others in their time of grief and comfort them with the comfort I have been given (2 Corinthians 1:3-4).
So yes, while I am sad that I am not holding my daughter in my arms today. And I am sad that this will be the last date to look "forward" (as in to the future) to. And while the Thanksgiving I invinsioned a mere 12 weeks ago now looks completely different I hope that I can sufficiently say Thank You to my God, my Father and my Comforter.
So today and always, I will thank God in every remembrance of her, my beautiful Shyla Joy!