Monday, November 23, 2009

Counting backwards.

When parents bring a healthy new baby into this world, they begin counting.  They count months.  They count milestones.  They count birthdays.  They count forwards. 
When parents don't bring their baby home, they count too.  They count days, weeks, months, since they last held them in their arms.  They count moments they are missing.  They count "angelversaries", or "anniversaries" or "angeldays".  They count backwards.
Today was the last due date given by my doctor.  It is here.  There is just one more day to look forward (as in looking to the future) to.  The first due date that we were given, and the one my husband and I recognize is this Thursday.  Thanksgiving Day.  We will be counting that day too.  Counting how many ways we are blessed because our daughter lived.  Counting how many people have been blessed by her short life.  Counting the many many many ways God has blessed our lives. 
After Thursday, it all goes backwards again.  No more "what should have been" dates.  Now there are only "what there are dates".  I pray that there are more blessings to come and that we never forget how blessed we are.  Even when we are counting backwards.

7 comments:

Allison said...

May you have peace on your due date, mine is not until Feb 28th and it really scares me to think about it.

((HUGS))

Jessica said...

I wish you lots *hugs* and peace as you approach your due date. Mine is December 1st so I can imagine some of the emotions you maybe feeling.

Amy said...

I will pray that you find peace in going forward again.

I'm stopping by from IComLeavWe and just read through a bit of your blog. I have no wise words of comfort to offer, only prayers.

Heather said...

This is so true...

I am praying for you.

Owen said...

Wishing you a happy American Thanksgiving - we Canadians have had ours already - and a great IComLeavWe week.

jlynn said...

Thinking of you and praying you find some peace this holiday season.
(((hugs)))
ICLW

Kristin said...

Dates of losses and dates those babies should have been here are so hard. {{{Hugs}}} and I pray you find peace and happiness.