Saturday, October 30, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 30

One Last Moment.

Well, this month, this week has been a blur!  I can't believe it has been 30 days!  I have been too sick this week to really even know what's going on, but I don't want to complain...

I'm feeling much better and I want to leave this blog challenge with this...

Enough about me!!!

I'm ready to move on to better things...different things. 

I'm ready for November.  For change.  For the Holidays (believe it or not!)  As hard as they may be, they will bring brightness and joy to the otherwise dim and dying landscape of winter.  Bring it on! 

Plus, the sooner the Holidays pass, the closer we are to spring!

Friday, October 29, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 29

My aspirations.

I want to never stop striving to be more like Jesus. 
I want to be a person who it empathetic and caring. 
I want my legacy to be one of love and for people to remember me by what I gave. 
I want to love on my kids, be a good wife and a good example to others. 
I want to share with other mothers that it is ok to remember their babies in Heaven and be a person they can talk to when they need it.
I want to homeschool, even for a year. 
I want to volunteer and I want to create. 
In the words of Dr. Joanne from the MISS Foundation, "I do not simply want to survive, I want to become."

Thursday, October 28, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 28

Something I miss...

Being niave.  Being so blissfully happy during pregnancy that I could burst and only momentarily thinking of the "what-ifs".  The feeling that even though I know bad things happen, they aren't really that common and really, with no family history, it could never happen to me.  That was how I felt in my first two pregnancies.  This one is SO different.  It's not like I let the fear and worry consume every minute of the pregnancy, but they are things that are on my mind everyday and nervousness that creeps in before every appointment and while the doppler is waving around on my tummy before we hear that beautiful sound of a strong heartbeat. I don't know how to say it except to say it is SO different.

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 27

My favorite place.

Currently, is curled up in my bed with a box of tissues :(

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 26

My fears.

I'm really sick right now.  Allergies or something.  My biggest fear now is that by not taking meds, I will harm this baby by being taking meds, I will harm this baby.

This is so hard.

I just pray for wisdom, healing and God's protection for me and my little rainbow.

Monday, October 25, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 25

A first.

I really don't know where to go with this one. 

For the first time in my life, I am making a conscious decision to say no and to take care of myself.  I'm thinking of my real priorities and not the ones that are temporary. 

Sunday, October 24, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 24

Something that makes me cry.

Sadly, these days, it doesn't take much.

The commercial for Disney where they show home videos of parents telling their kids they will be going there always gets me.  Things that catch me off guard are the worst though. Like a song or a comment that breaks my heart just a little.  Like when people tell Ethan that "Someday he will make a great big brother".  To me, he already does make a great big brother...but I understand what people are trying to say...but sometimes is still hurts...

Saturday, October 23, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 23

Something that makes me feel better.

Dancing with my little man :)

Friday, October 22, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 22

Something that upsets me.

Hearing of another mother's loss.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 21

Another Moment.

Tonight I stood on a stage infront of over 200 people and told our story again.  Shyla's story. Rainbow's story and Ethan's story.  Each of them weaved together by hope, grief and blessings.

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 20

This month.


This month has flown by!  There is so many heartfelt things I want to post, but I did commit to this 30 day posting challenge and here I am!  I will finish this!  And while I may not post everyday in November, I will hopefully take the time to post when I need to.  I know this blog has been very theraputic for me and there is lots of stuff going on.  Don't worry, the rainbow is doing fine, but just lots of other stuff.

Work has been crazy this month!  Even with a week of fall break, it seems that I am more tired than ever and the tasks at work keep stacking up. I don't know how long it has been since I have seen the top of my desk!

October 15th and the service we had at church took a lot of time, prep work, and advertising.  And I am speaking at a banquet tomorrow night.  My birthday was this week and my brother came in.

This weekend, I have been notified of two more mothers who now have babies in Heaven.  One was a 5 month old who passed away Saturday from SIDS.  Another went to Heaven at 38 weeks gestation.  People are contacting me, wanting to know how to be there for their friends and passing along my contact info.

All in all...I'm busy and I'm tired. 

I have to say the best part of this month was seeing the great ultrasound and hitting the 2nd trimester!  Wow!  Where did that three months go?

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 19

Something I regret.

Boy, this list could go on forever...

I regret...

...not making a point to have the nurses give me back the onesie Shyla was wearing when we held her.
...not getting a photo of her perfect little feet.
...not having a photographs of the funeral.
...not being tested for this clotting disorders sooner.
...working so hard.
...not insisting my extreme swelling be seen by a doc.
...not going to L&D sooner.
...not taking longer off work.

I could go on and on.

I also thought should list things I don't regret.

I will never regret...

...holding and seeing my baby.
...having a funeral that family and friends could attend.
...taking photos of her.
...her life.
...donating her things to the Pregnancy Center.
...speaking out at public events.
...talking about her.
...being her mommy.

Much love to you all and I hope you all had a peaceful Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day.

Monday, October 18, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 18

My Favorite Birthday.

This is a hard one.  I had lots of great birthdays growing up.  A few not so great when I got older (like my  18th when my uncle had a quadruple bypass surgery, my pet bird died and a role model passed away within a few days). 

I've also had some good ones as I have gotten older.  Today was a good one too.  But as hard as I try, no happy event ever feels 100% happy anymore.

My favorite birthday as an adult is probably when Ethan was about 15 months old, we took him to the zoo and spent a day together as a family.  It was a beautiful fall day and we had an amazing time.  I love spending time with my family.

Sunday, October 17, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 17

Favorite Memory.

Sheesh.  Thats a tough one.  How about I just give a favorite memory from today?

Today, I watched Ethan fish with his daddy at the family pond.  He casted like a pro and for three years old can really do a great job reeling!  He loves to fish with his daddy and always has.

Saturday, October 16, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge - Day 15

I missed posting yesterday.  I was a mess most of the morning.  I guess I've just had too much going on and when I finally had a moment to sit still for a moment...the fatigue, aggrivation and hurt of a few different things kind of overwhelmed me.  But here I am house, laundry, back to the everyday stuff.

So, I'm going to post day 15 today and catch back up to day 17 tomorrow.  So I guess I should just call this a 29 day blog challenge...

Today's topic is "My dreams".

My literal dreams are usually odd or traumatic.  When I was about 13 I started having terrible, vivid, frightening and even gory dreams.  They felt so real and terrifying.  I often woke up crying or so afraid I couldn't move or make a noise.  My mom got concerned and she took me to a Doctor that treated with herbs and he suggested pumpkin seed oil capsules.  Believe it or not...they really helped.  The dreams stopped and I eventually stopped taking the herbs.  But still, every once in a while, I will have one of those terrifying waking-up-in-tears dreams.

The July before Shyla went to Heaven I had a bad dream.  In my dream my husband died, or got killed, it wasn't really clear which.  The whole dream was long and drawn out and pretty much started with an officer notifying me of his death and then what happens from there.  I mean details.  From going to the funeral home to make arrangements, to picking out his clothes, to the day-to-day life after he was gone and how things were so different.  When I first woke up, still in the place between asleep and awak, it was like I heard a very kind voice say, "This was not to scare you, it was to prepare you"  That's when I lost it.  I began bawling and shaking and it woke up my husband.  I was so torn up, I couldn't even talk. 

This dream still haunts me.  Was God trying to prepare me for what would happen in jsut a matter of a few weeks?

I had another dream while I was pregnant with Shyla.  This it kind of complicated.  I had gotten word that my dad was very sick, near death, and being kept at a hospital.  For some reason, I decided to walk to where he was from I was staying.  It was raining and it was in a residential part of a city.  I crossed the street and started walking up a steep hill glancing in the windows of houses as I walked.  Then I passed one house and saw my half-sister's mother sitting at a table facing the window looking at what seemed to be a scrapbook.  She looked up and apparently recognized me.  She waved at me and motioned for me to go to the door.  As I walked to the door, I passed another window in the same house and saw a little girl with dark hair and freckles sitting in a different room coloring.  She looked up and saw me and smiled a huge smile and waved.  I waved back and didn't think anything about it.  The woman let me in and told me she had something to show me.  She showed me the scrapbook that had pictures of my dad in it.  Most of them were pictures I had never seen before in real life, but I could tell they were my dad.  There were even a few I know I had seen before.  After a few minutes, I started wondering about that little girl and noticed that we didn't pass a door way that would have went into what looked like the room she was in.  We kept looking at pictures and then I saw one of my dad and my half-sister when she was young and I knew the little girl I had seen coloring through the window was my sister.  I ran back through the hallway where I had entered looking for the room I had seen her in, but I just couldn't find it or her.  This is where I woke up bawling.

My sister and I weren't really close, but I just found out I was pregnant with Ethan (and hadn't even had the chance to tell my mom) when she died.  It has always bothered me I never got to tell her that for some reason.  I actually ended up telling my dad on the day of my sisters funeral.

These are the two dreams that stick out to me the most from when I was pregnant.  I have had many dreams since Shyla went to Heaven, and sadly, most of them were nightmares.

I wish so badly I could dream of her being alive and well.  I want to see her in Heaven.  Perfect and playing.  I want to dream of what color eyes she has and if she would have had the gentle personality I thought she would.  I guess I'll just have to wait until Heaven to know some things. 

Thursday, October 14, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 14

What I wore today...

Tonight was the Pregnancy and Infant Loss service at my church.

Sufficient Grace Giveaway!

Kelly at Sufficient Grace Ministries is having a huge My Forever Child Giveaway!  Head on over to her blog and enter!  I love my MFC peice that has Shyla's footprints engraved on it!

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 13

This week.

This week, so far, has been a crazy busy week! I'm on Fall Break from work this week and I was looking forward to a relaxing week at home with Ethan, but I guess that is going to have to wait.

Monday, I worked on the slideshow for the Pregnancy and Infant Loss Service I have been planning with the help of some great people.  Both my desktop and my laptop were acting weird and being extrememly slow so it took basically all day!  At 5:00 Ethan and I decided to go to Somerset and watch some great ladies from the church practice something for Thursday .  It was beautiful!  I can't wait to see how everything comes together, but I am getting SO nervous!  After that, we went to the store to get milk and pink and blue ribbon.  Of course, we had to look at the fish while we were there!  We finally got out of there and went to get some dinner.  We don't usually eat fast food during the week, but Ethan had been so good, I got him a special dinner to eat...on the way home.  It was after 9:00 by the time we actually got in the door and then started the bedtime routine.

Tuesday was my first pregnancy appointment with my awesome high risk OB.  We got to Lexington early to do a little shopping and eat lunch before my early afternoon appointment.  The sonographer did the ultrasound and we got to watch the baby for around 15 minutes!  She really needed to measure the area on the back of the neck and baby was facing us.  So we got to watch it until it turned and she could get the right measurements.  Her words were, "Everything looks perfect!"  We got to see the Dr. and he gave us some advice to make my shots less painful.  He seemed as excited as we are that we are pregnant.  I just really love both my Docs!

Today is Wednesday.  I worked on cutting ribbon, melting the edges so they don't fray and pinning them this morning.  I got some more requests for the slideshow, so I worked on that this afternoon and have been working on adding music to the slideshow and getting the slides to show the right length of time.  I've also taken several breaks to read and play with Ethan.  I've got some laundry to finish and the dishwasher to take care of.  But, I have stayed at home all day!  That is a big accomplishment!

Thursday is the service at church.  I'm sure this day will busy.  I've still got lots to do to get ready for the service.  I really hope that hearts are touched and connections are made.

Friday, I hope to have plans with a friend (and old roomate) for a girls afternoon.  She is due in early November with her 2nd and we just never get to see each other.  I'm really hoping it works out!  It is also Pregnancy and Infant Loss Day of Remembrance, so I will be wearing my pink and blue ribbon and lighting a candle at 7:00pm. 

Saturday is kind of up in the air.  Maybe I can try to rest a little.  Although I am really hoping to do something as a family this weekend.  We usually do go on a little trip as a family, but I just don't think it is going to happen this year :( 

Sunday I will be spending time with my Grandmother and a couple cousins and aunt and uncle.  My uncle and I share the same birthday and my Grandma usually tries to do something for us.  I love spending time with my extended family so much. 

Next week is even busier!  Maybe I can get some rest on Saturday!

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 12

Whats in your bag?

I wish I had a photo of this one...

I had an appointment with my high risk OB today, so I took my big bag.

I had two books, a folder, a notebook, my wallet, several pens, a book for my hubby, my phone, some mints and my planner.  When I left, I had four beautiful ultrasound photos of my rainbow!

Everything is looking good and I go to my regular OB in 2 weeks!

Monday, October 11, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 11

My Siblings.

(My brothers helped with the balloons for the balloon release at Shyla's service.)
I have two brothers.  They are awesome. 

My older brother lives several states away and I don't get to see him and his family nearly as often as I would like to.  We are just 19 months apart and we have so many great memories together.

My younger (I have to be careful and not cal him my "little" brother) brother lives about an hour and a half away and we are about 3 1/2 years apart.  He is a funny guy.  Ethan absolutely LOVES him.  They are like best friends!

I also had a half sister.  She passed away just over 4 years ago and I still think of her often.  We have the same dad and we lived together for a while when I was younger.  As she got older, she made some mistakes and had some issues, but we still kept in touch off and on.  She had 5 kids.  Two sets of fraternal boy/girl twins and another little girl.  I love these kids.  The last time I saw them was at her funeral.  They all live in another state and communications with them have been pretty much next to none.  They are still my neices and nephews though!


My brothers, mom, sis-in-law, and their baby girl.

I also have a two great sis-in-laws and brother-in-laws through my hubby.  I just had to mention them too!

Sunday, October 10, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 10

What did I wear today is supposed to be the topic.  But I'm not talking about clothes.

I wore a smile today.  And a few tears.  And my heart on my sleeve. 

Some very dear people to us got married yesterday and included Shyla in their special day.  Ben and I appreciated it very much and it brought up feeling that I hadn't had in a while.

I'm very thankful for many things and while yesterday was a day full of smiles, laughter and happiness, the void was more evident than ever and it made us realize that even the happiest days will not be 100% happy until we are on the other side of the veil of Heaven.

Saturday, October 9, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 9

My beliefs.

A song originally by Rich Mullins and covered by Third Day describes my beliefs and I wanted to share it with you all today.


I believe in God the Father

Almighty Maker of Heaven and Maker of Earth
And in Jesus Christ His only begotten Son, our Lord

He was conceived by the Holy Spirit
Born of the virgin Mary
Suffered under Pontius Pilate
He was crucified and dead and buried
And I believe what I believe is what makes me what I am
I did not make it, no it is making me
It is the very truth of God and not the invention of any man

I believe that He who suffered was crucified, buried, and dead
He descended into hell and on the third day, rose again
He ascended into Heaven where He sits at God's mighty right hand
I believe that He's returning
To judge the quick and the dead of the sons of men

And I believe what I believe is what makes me what I am
I did not make it, no it is making me
It is the very truth of God and not the invention of any man

I believe it, I believe it
I believe it
I believe it, I believe it
I believe in God the Father
Almighty Maker of Heaven and Maker of Earth
And in Jesus Christ His only begotten Son, our Lord
I believe in the Holy Spirit
One Holy Church
The communion of Saints
The forgiveness of sin
I believe in the resurrection
I believe in a life that never ends
And I believe what I believe is what makes me what I am
I did not make it, no it is making me
I did not make it, no it is making me
I said I did not make it, no it is making me
It is the very truth of God and
not the invention of any man
I believe it, I believe
I believe it, I believe
I believe it, I believe it
I believe it, I believe it
I believe it, I believe it
I believe it

And the Winner is...


Using Lori is the winner of the giveaway this month!  Lori, just send me an email with your mailing address!

Friday, October 8, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 8

A moment.

Tonight.  In the van. From the back seat, this was heard...

"Mommy...I love GOD!!!"

This moment made me feel so many emotions at once.


Thursday, October 7, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 7

Day 7- Your Best Friend

Plain and simple...

Ben and I on our first date February 2004.

Hiking together, summer 2004.

His graduation photo.  2004.

Ben and I on our wedding day 2005.

Horseback riding in Jamaica on our honeymoon.

In the operating room with Ethan when he was born.  2007.

Teaching Ethan to fish. 2008.

My Graduation Day. 2008.


Beautiful soul. Spring 2009.

Ben and Shyla. September 2, 2009.

My family.  April 2010.

My best friend and I on our daughter's first birthday. 

He is my best friend.  My supporter. My cheerleader.  I love him and am so blessed to have him in my life. 

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 6

First of all, don't forget to enter the giveaway!  Even if you have already read the book, you can enter and give it to a friend or I have an alternative book if the winner has already read I'll Hold you in Heaven.

Day 6- My Day

Today was my average Wednesday.  It doesn't make for thrilling reading material, but here goes.

Up around 5:30.  Get ready.  Drop Ethan off at my Mom's and to work by 7:00. 

The school I work at is doing a March of Dimes fundraiser and I spent the day off and on in the Elementary collecting the coin boxes and seeing teachers.  I also spent my day with a few high school students who just needed to talk.  Also handled some other sensative issues (can't be too specific due to confidentiality).  I got busy with a student and missed taking Ethan to storytime.  He loves our Wednesday dates at the Library...actually I think I was more disappointed than he was that we missed this week.  After work I spent some time at my Grandmothers house and my Mom's house until Ben got off work. My lovely hubby cooked supper while I did puzzles with Ethan to make up for canceling our date.  Dinner was yummy and then I spent some time working on stuff for the Pregnancy and Infant Loss Service I am planning for next week.  I got Ethan in the tub and grabbed the laptop to read some of the blogs I follow and do this post! 
Hubby is getting Ethan out of the tub and it is now time for stories, devotion, and "what was your favorite part of today" routine...which IS actually my favorite part of the day.  I'll end the day with those shots I mentioned yesterday.  There is not a word to describe how thankful I am for this medication and at the same time how much I hate them.  No one told me they would be so painful :(  But it will all be worth it! :)  I don't want to sound ungrateful!

I honestly can't believe I have gone 6 days in a row...while working...and posted everyday!  Wow.  I usually only post this much when I'm off for holidays or summers.  I guess it is good motivation.

Thanks for all the great comments on the past few posts. 

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 5

My definition of love...

My husband is about to give me my nightly blood thinner shot...neither of us enjoy this, but he is doing it for me...and for our baby :)

Monday, October 4, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 4

Today's topic is "What you ate today"...

I started off today with a bowl of

For lunch I had some left over pasta fagoli...yumo!  And a few grapes.

I also had two chocolate chip cookies for a snack.

For supper, I had some of my mom's wonderful potato soup!  It was perfect soup weather today!
My diet wasn't very "green" today...but I eat what I can when I can at the moment.

Odd topic today...but thanks for reading!

Don't forget about my giveaway!

Sunday, October 3, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 3

Day Three of the blog challenge is Parents.

My parents met in the early 80's.  My mom was a college graduate with a degree in psychology and she met my dad through a group of friends.  Dad was a Harley riding, vietnam vet.  He had joined the army young and spent his time overseas. 

From their marriage came three kids.  My dad also had a daughter from a previous marriage.  Things were not the best and eventually, they divorced when I was about five years old.  Honestly, it was the best thing in the world for me.  I remember feeling relieved.

Dispite their differences, my parents still talked and my dad even came over to my mom's house every Christmas and even a few birthdays and other times just to visit.  They always get along well on these occasions.  Some people think it is weird that they can hang out like that, but I think when we were younger, they really did it for us and it just got easier. 

My mom.

I just love my Momma!  She would do anything in the world for me and bent over backwards to give my brothers and I a great childhood.  She worked for the state in the office of Protection and Permenancy (Social Services) for 27 years.  Many of those years were on the front lines as a case worker and the last several as the office supervisor.  She has a heart of gold and did her job well.  She retired the day after my 3 year old was born.  She watches him while I work.

At my wedding, instead of having my dad walk me the entire way down the aisle, he started and walked me from the back of the church to my older brother who was a few rows from the back of the church.  Dad hugged me and handed me to him.  My older brother then gave me a white calla lily and hugged me and then I went solo a few more steps (thankfully, the church had a LONG aisle!) to my younger brother who gave me another lily and hugged me.  From there a man who has been like a "spiritual father" gave me another lily, then my grandfather, then my godfather (and the man who performed our ceremony) and lastly my husbands father gave me a flower.  I then went to my mom.  Mom tied these flowers given to me by all the male leaders in my life and made it complete.  To me, it was symbolic of how, eventhough my I didn't grow up with my dad in the house, my mom had always placed me with male role models and tied everything together.

Mom is tying it all together.
 Ben, Mom and I after our ceremony.
My Dad.

My dad and I talk and I know that he loves me.  One of my favorite parts of Christmas growing up (and still kind of) is when my dad gets to my Mom's house on Christmas morning.  He keeps his change all year and his $1 bills.  He brings them to us on Christmas and lets us split up the money.  Now that my brother and I have kids, we split the change between his Grandkids and the adults still keep the ones :)  It is just one of those family traditions.  Just like all of us cramming together on the couch in our Christmas jammies to take a family picture.
He had his issues (but who doesn't, right?) but he always wanted my brothers and I to know he loves us.  Dad had 11 brothers and sisters and several of them have already passed away.  As I mentioned before, Dad served in Vietnam and that left him with his scars, so I never blame him for not being around more or for his other struggles.  I love my dad.  And I ask that those of you that pray, to lift him up and pray he sees how much he is loved and that He sees God as a real, loving God. 

Dad and I before my wedding.

I just got way more personal than I meant to in this post, but I guess that is what these blog challenges are for, huh...

Well, thanks for reading!

Saturday, October 2, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 2

The topic of today is "First Love".

My first love.  My love for my first love grows stronger with everyday.  I met him at a very early age and, admittidly, have been closer at some times than other over the years feels closer now than ever.  My first love never judges me or makes me feel like less.  I feel undeserving of his love and how precious I am to him.  Forgiving, loving, comforting, and I never have to pretend I am something I'm not...and even if I did try to pretend, he knows better.  When others may judge, he knows my heart better than anyone else.  I have never seen my first love's face, but I know his presence and see him in the face of a hyper three year old and a breeze and a butterfly. 

My Jesus was my first love.  If you don't know him, you really should meet him.  He is awesome.

2nds for Shyla (Giveaway!)

Today is the 2nd of October.  Crazy.

It's notw been 13 months since Shyla was born. 

I have such a conflict when it comes to the dates of the events of last August and September.  You see, I don't really know what day her spirit left her earthly shell and went to be with Jesus.  That day I will probably never know.  I know it was in the last days of August, but not the specific day.  I know the day we found out she was gone.  August 31.  And then there is September 2nd.  The day her body was taken from mine.  I have a hard time calling it her "birth" day.  Her spirit was given to the Father before this day.  So when people asked when my daughter died or when she was born, I feel like there is a five minute explanation.  When the last of the month rolls around, what day can I really call hers?  I have struggled with this from the beginning.  The lone singular date on her stone even bothers me.  "September 2, 2009" does not tell the full story, but just part of it.  I hated that was all I could put on there and as generations pass and some one looks at that stone years from now, that is all they will know.

I have tried to make peace with this and realize it is ok to call that her day.  But it has been hard.  As all the "one year" marks came and went last month, I think I finally have decided that the 2nd will be her day.  I will always remember August 31, but the 2nd of every month is what I have counted as the time passed for how many months she has been gone. So, from now on...the 2nd's are for Shyla.

To mark this "2nd"  I would like to do my first ever GIVEAWAY!!!  This months giveaway is for a copy of the first book that really touched my heart in the days and months after my loss.  I'll Hold You in Heaven by Jack Hayford gives us reason to not just hope, but to know where our babies are and that we WILL be with them again!  I will also been sending a few gifts designed specifically for the person who wins including a candle with your child's name, a pink and blue ribbon for October 15th and a few other goodies!

For one entry, be a follower of this blog (just make that your comment).

For another entry, share with me the first book that really was an ecouragement to after your loss.

For a third entry, share the giveaway on your blog or facebook and just comment letting me know you have done so. A winner will be chosen one week from today (Saturday, October 10).

Friday, October 1, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge-Day One

I always try to "meet" anyone who comments or starts following my blog and recently Jessie left a really sweet comment and I hopped over to her blog.  Jessie is doing a 30 day blog challenge and I thought about doing it as well.  I have been kind of absent from the blog world lately and thought this might help me get back into it...but I wasn't sold on the idea yet.  I scrolled down through the days and noticed what the 18th was..."Your Favorite Birthday"...well...the 18th of this month is actually my birthday.  And I thought it would be a great way to celebrate my blogging birthday!  So the decision was made to try this blog challenge.  I don't think I have ever posted everyday for a month and October is turning out to be a pretty busy month, but I'm still going to try it!  Join me, wont you?

30 Day Blog Challenge

Day 01 – Introduce yourself

Day 02 – Your first love

Day 03 – Your parents

Day 04 – What you ate today

Day 05 – Your definition of love

Day 06 – Your day

Day 07 – Your best friend

Day 08 – A moment

Day 09 – Your beliefs

Day 10 – What you wore today

Day 11 – Your siblings

Day 12 – What’s in your bag

Day 13 – This week

Day 14 – What you wore today

Day 15 – Your dreams

Day 16 – Your first kiss

Day 17 – Your favorite memory

Day 18 – Your favorite birthday

Day 19 – Something you regret

Day 20 – This month

Day 21 – Another moment

Day 22 – Something that upsets you

Day 23 – Something that makes you feel better

Day 24 – Something that makes you cry

Day 25 – A first

Day 26 – Your fears

Day 27 – Your favorite place

Day 28 – Something that you miss

Day 29 – Your aspirations

Day 30 – One last moment

So day one agenda is to introduce myself.  I'm going to keep it brief, but try to get as much in as I can. 

I was born and raised in rural south central Kentucky and I love the beautiful foothills of the Appalachians and the amazing lake that surround the area in which I live.  I accepted Christ at an early age and I love Jesus!  I have an older brother, a younger brother and I had a half sister who passed away four years ago this week.  I have a degree in Social Work and my LSW and I love helping others and finding resources.  I love kids.  I met my husband on Valentines Day and married on New Years Eve of the next year.  This year will be our 5th anniversary!  We have a 3 1/2 year old son and our beautiful daughter was stillborn September 2, 2009.  I am pregnant with our rainbow baby and am due before Easter.  I love my family, reading, being surrounded by those I love and music.  I also love crafting, sewing, scrapbooking and photography.  My passion is helping others through the loss of a child and preparing care packages for the local hospital for parents who experience stillbirth.  I have been asked to speak at various venues to raise awareness and support for pregnancy and infant loss and feel blessed to have such a loving God who never ceases to amaze me with His grace and compassion.

1st Blogiversary!

One year ago today I began this blog.  It began as a way for me to just get out all of the feelings I had been going through over the past month since Shyla went to Heaven.  But it is now so so much more than that.  I count myself blessed to "know" each of you that comment and whose blogs I also can read.  You are all awesome!

I can't wait to see what the next year holds!