Sunday, October 3, 2010

30 Day Blog Challenge- Day 3

Day Three of the blog challenge is Parents.

My parents met in the early 80's.  My mom was a college graduate with a degree in psychology and she met my dad through a group of friends.  Dad was a Harley riding, vietnam vet.  He had joined the army young and spent his time overseas. 

From their marriage came three kids.  My dad also had a daughter from a previous marriage.  Things were not the best and eventually, they divorced when I was about five years old.  Honestly, it was the best thing in the world for me.  I remember feeling relieved.

Dispite their differences, my parents still talked and my dad even came over to my mom's house every Christmas and even a few birthdays and other times just to visit.  They always get along well on these occasions.  Some people think it is weird that they can hang out like that, but I think when we were younger, they really did it for us and it just got easier. 

My mom.

I just love my Momma!  She would do anything in the world for me and bent over backwards to give my brothers and I a great childhood.  She worked for the state in the office of Protection and Permenancy (Social Services) for 27 years.  Many of those years were on the front lines as a case worker and the last several as the office supervisor.  She has a heart of gold and did her job well.  She retired the day after my 3 year old was born.  She watches him while I work.

At my wedding, instead of having my dad walk me the entire way down the aisle, he started and walked me from the back of the church to my older brother who was a few rows from the back of the church.  Dad hugged me and handed me to him.  My older brother then gave me a white calla lily and hugged me and then I went solo a few more steps (thankfully, the church had a LONG aisle!) to my younger brother who gave me another lily and hugged me.  From there a man who has been like a "spiritual father" gave me another lily, then my grandfather, then my godfather (and the man who performed our ceremony) and lastly my husbands father gave me a flower.  I then went to my mom.  Mom tied these flowers given to me by all the male leaders in my life and made it complete.  To me, it was symbolic of how, eventhough my I didn't grow up with my dad in the house, my mom had always placed me with male role models and tied everything together.

Mom is tying it all together.
 Ben, Mom and I after our ceremony.
My Dad.

My dad and I talk and I know that he loves me.  One of my favorite parts of Christmas growing up (and still kind of) is when my dad gets to my Mom's house on Christmas morning.  He keeps his change all year and his $1 bills.  He brings them to us on Christmas and lets us split up the money.  Now that my brother and I have kids, we split the change between his Grandkids and the adults still keep the ones :)  It is just one of those family traditions.  Just like all of us cramming together on the couch in our Christmas jammies to take a family picture.
He had his issues (but who doesn't, right?) but he always wanted my brothers and I to know he loves us.  Dad had 11 brothers and sisters and several of them have already passed away.  As I mentioned before, Dad served in Vietnam and that left him with his scars, so I never blame him for not being around more or for his other struggles.  I love my dad.  And I ask that those of you that pray, to lift him up and pray he sees how much he is loved and that He sees God as a real, loving God. 

Dad and I before my wedding.

I just got way more personal than I meant to in this post, but I guess that is what these blog challenges are for, huh...

Well, thanks for reading!


Melani said...

I love what you did with the male role models, and your mom tying them all together...that's a great idea! My father in law was in Vietnam and also has his "issues" so I totally understand what you mean by that! It's sad!!!

Maggie said...

I love this post! And what beautiful pictures! :)

Lisette said...

I love your photos. I think that was a great idea to include everyone while you walked down the isle.
I loved this post, thank you for sharing.

Lori said...

I love your walking down the aisle idea!! So neat.

I also love the $ tradition at Christmas...wonder if I could get anyone to start that for our family!

Bless your dad's are right--the scars left on those men and women (and still today with the various other conflicts and wars) are indescribable and unimaginable. Praying for your dad...

Anonymous said...

I enjoyed this Blog and the flower/isle idea was way awesome!!

(hugz n prayers for you and yours)

Teresa (Ashley's mom)