Friday, February 18, 2011
I know I have mentioned how I feel like my life is separated into Acts. Act I was my life before September 2, 2009. Act 2 is after. During the first act of my life, HOPE was not something I really thought about all that much. There are some really beautiful songs about HOPE. "My Hope is in You" by Third Day and "Only Hope" by Switchfoot come to mind. I knew some scriptures about hope. "...faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love" and "hope deferred makes the heart sick". And I heard people use it as a word to describe something that might not happen. "I hope we can make it to the gas station without running out of gas."
In the "Act 2" of my life, HOPE has taken on a completely new meaning. It's no longer a word to throw out like "maybe" or just a pretty sounding word. HOPE is everything. God is my only HOPE. God is my everything. He alone provides the strength, joy and laughter to get through the good and bad days alike. He alone sends me glimpses of my babies. Assuring me they are safe and happy and experiencing Him like I can only dream. Sometimes the dreams so real that I swear He has wisked me away to some secret place. Not just dreams while I sleep, but when I see them in my minds eye...when I visit their graves...when Ethan speaks of them...when I hold their blankets and say their sweet names. Act 2 gives me the strength to say as Job did, "Though he slay me, yet I will hope in Him" (Job 13:15)
And now, it seems like I am entering a new time in my life yet again. Act 2, Scene 2 is all about HOPE. As we began this adoption journey (actually long before) we decided our little girl's middle name would be Hope. Because God is faithful. This time in our lives we say, "We wait in hope for the Lord; he is our help and our shield. In him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in his holy name. May your unfailing love rest upin us, O Lord, even as we put our hope in you." Psalm 33:20-22
What a gift HOPE is. What a gift Hope will be!
I've decided as a part of the little miracles blog hop, I will start listing the things that give me HOPE. Since today is the first installment of this blog hop...let's just start with the number 1....
Things that bring me HOPE...
1. a sunrise
2. the smile of a child
3. Hearing the sweetest little boy I know learn to spell his first word..."H.O.P.E. Hope!" he screams from the other room. Yes, son, Hope!
4. seeing a baptism
5. a fresh rain
6. Zephaniah 3:17 "The Lord your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing."
7. my husband's embrace.
9. Strong mama's
10. innocent eyes