As I was driving to work on Friday I was listening to my normal radio morning show, Doug and Kim in the Morning. Every Friday on the morning show is Love on Your Kids Friday. I usually listen and smile as I hear parents call in and talk about how great their babies, toddlers, young kids, pre-teens, teens, adult children and even grandchildren are. It makes me smile. But last Friday, I was thinking about our journey as parents and how both of our children have touched our lives in different, but equally important ways and decided to call in and love on my kids.
I have never called into a radio station like that before. I thought I would probably not even hear the phone number before I got to work, but if I did, I would call. Immediately after that thought, the number was given. I did a big no-no and dailed while I drove.
I thought surely I would not get through and I would just get to work and go in as usual. After the first ring, I was greated by Doug saying, "Hey! You wanna love on your kids?!" I said yes and he said they would be right back with me when they finished the news. So I was put on hold.
When they came back, they asked for my name and for me to tell them about my kids. I told them about Ethan, my incredible (almost) three year old son who just happens to be the sweetest little boy I know. I told them how he constantly amazes me and inspires me to be a better mom. I bragged on him big time. Then I told them about my daughter. That she was stillborn at 28 weeks last September. (I heard them gasp in condolence). Then I went on to tell how because of her, I was motivated to seek out and create support in our area where none previously exsisted. I told them about us being the March of Dimes Ambassador family because of her and that the next day would be the walk where she would be remembered. I told them that there is now a support group here and that eventhough her life here with us was short, the effects of her life will be very long lasting. Kim said that she could identify with that kind of loss (it was then I remembered that she had lost a baby). She also said that it was great that we could turn something tragic into something that may help someone else. We chatted for just a minute and then they said they would get that on the radio soon.
I had been sitting in my van in the parking lot at work while we talked and I debated on going in or waiting until I heard it on air. I decided that I could probably get into the office and find the station before the end of the song that was playing, so I rushed in. When I got in there I plugged in the stereo and found the station, but it was full of static and kind of hard to hear. I turned on my computer so I could find the website and listen live online. I called my hubby and told him to turn on the radio and get Ethan where he could hear it. Just as I was able to hear it online, it aired. It wasn't until then I got kind of emotional. It was one of those moments when you hear the words coming out of your mouth that you never expected to hear. So surreal. I'm a mom to a baby girl in Heaven and a little boy on Earth. I love them both. They both have amazed me. They both have made me want to be a better mom...a better person. They both have filled my heart more than I thought possible. So I will hold onto Ethan tight and I'll continue to speak Shyla's name.
I just love to love on my kids.