Saturday, January 1, 2011

Year of Hope

"I will never forget this awful time, as I grieve over my loss.  Yet I still dare to hope when I remember this:  The faithful love of the Lord never ends!  His mercies never cease.  Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning.  I say to myself, "The Lord is my inheritance; therefore, I will hope in him!"  The Lord is good to those who depend on him, to those who search for him."

Lamentations 3:20-25

2011 is a year of hope. 
Hope like I've never known. 
2009 was Shyla's year.  It was the year of blessings and my first year of true grief and Creative Joy. 
2010 was Jakin's year.  The year of our rainbow.  It was our year of new beginnings and then new grief. 
2011 is our year of hope.  I'm standing in faith and believing that.  God is going to show me things this year like I have never seen before. 
My hope is in him.

There is something God laid on my heart a long time ago.  I shared it with Ben before we were married.  We have talked about it off and on through out our marriage, but we really became serious about it this summer and agreed we would move forward after Jakin was born in the spring.  Well, Jakin wasn't born in the spring, but made his journey to his Heavenly home much sooner.  I've been praying when the time was right, Ben and I would both be on the same page about what had been on our hearts...and I think we are. 

Ben gave me these for Christmas...

(Let me first clarify that the first one he says is mostly for him...he didn't want me to think he was calling me a name!)

We are hoping to adopt!  We had requested some info from an agency in our state and have began sorting through the information.  Right now, we are still praying and seeking God on what path to take, but as we were talking about it tonight and discussing when to share the news, we decided to go ahead and have people praying for us and with us every step of the way!  Also, it's not like I don't share pretty much everything anyway...I used to be such a private person!   

We are going to meet with the agency in a few weeks and get some of our major questions answered and ware still praying for God's direction and leading.  We understand we are about to be bombarded with questions, so let me just say one huge...

"We don't know"

We don't know exactly how we are going to completely pay for this yet...BUT God knows.
We don't know if God is preparing our baby through domestic or international adoption (although we are feeling pulled in one particular direction at the moment)...BUT God knows.
We don't know how long the process will take...BUT God knows.
We don't know...BUT God knows
He is forming our child in the secret places that are truely secret to us.  And that is AMAZING! 

We DO know...

How God feels about adoption.  He adopted us.  And it pleased him.

"God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ.  This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him much pleasure."

Ephesians 1: 5

So now, won't you join us in praying about all the things we don't know?  God will be holding our hand through every step.  We know it.  He has never left our sides in any other joy or grief we have ever experienced (but I can say He has been awfully quiet at times...or maybe I was just too loud to hear him...hmmmm).  I can almost see him in Heaven now cradling our babies and preparing the heart of another little one to be a part of our forever family!

(One more thing!  Happy New Year!  I pray much hope, peace, joy, and laughter fill your hearts and homes this year!)


Tim and Carissa Wix said...

I love this and will be praying for you guys as God does his work!

Jen said... exciting..praying for your family as you take the next step.. God knows our hearts and is working on a plan for us, even we have no idea how its all going to play out..
<3 he is so good..and so faithful..

Sarita Boyette said...

I will be praying for you as you begin the process of researching and applying for adoption. It is amazing that God laid it upon your heart before you were married - I know you have a lot of love to share with a child, no matter how he/she comes into your family.

Melissa said...

I will be walking this path with you and I am so glad we have each other for support. Happy New Year.

Antoinette said...

im praying for you as is to a year of HoPE!!!

amiracle4us said...

This put a smile on my face. I know things aren't known but seeing you both move forward together is a beautiful site :) I hope your path is found and know at the end there is happiness and a lil sweet bundle for you guys! xo

Caroline said...

I'm praying for you and I'm excited for you all. This is something to smile about and what a beautiful post.

{{HUGS}} & HoPe for 2011

mrsnice777 said...

How exciting! Praying for direction in your lives!


Amanda said...

What exciting news & incredible faith you have. I'll def say a prayer (or 2 =)) for you. You know, I often wonder if I, too, have been too loud to hear Him at times or if I just don't pay attention. LOL Anyway, I'm believing GREAT things ahead for you & myself. =)

Melissa said...

What an amazing post, Mattie. Thanks for sharing your heart and your journey. I will pray that God will show you the way, He does know and you can put your faith in that. Here's to a hopeful year, 2011!

Melissa Joy said...

This has me in tears.
Because I am in these shoes too.

Praying God's HOPE to fill you and overwhelm you this year.

Elwood & Laura Bradley said...

You may not know it but I love you so much Lady Bugg. I am sorry that I have been lax; in reading your blog and showing my support. My heart leaps with joy when i read your blogs and this one especially touched me so. I am filled with excitement for what I am positive God has in store for you, Ben and sweet little Ethan. Great and wonderful things are coming your way. I love you Sweetie and we are praying for "all the things you don't know". I know without a doubt that He will be holding your hand. Praying that your joy and Hope will continue to increase abundantly this year. Also, it put a smile on my face to imagine God cradling my "big" baby! (((hugs)))

Monica said...

I finally just read this, a little late. How exciting!! Praying with you and can't wait to see what God is gonna do here.

Jaime said...

What fantastic news!