Thursday, November 17, 2011

My Hope Fulfilled: Interview Project

November is National Adoption Month and to celebrate, Heather from Production, Not Reproduction organized the adoption bloggers Interview Project!  Bloggers with experiences in all kinds of of adoption joined in and were randomly paired together for interviews.

I was paired with Michelle from My Hope Fulfilled.  It has been a blessing learning more about Michelle and her beautiful family.  Michelle blogs about her family, open adoption, parenting, and other fun things.  You can read her story HERE.

Below is my questions (in bold) and her answers.  You can read my answers to her questions on this post.

Q:  When you were in the beginning phases of the adoption process, what were the major factors that led you to domestic infant adoption?

: : The cost, the timeline, and the average age of the child placed in our family.  

Q: After talking to other adoptive parents, I often learn that husbands and wives often have very different concerns about adoption.  Was that the case for you?   If so, what were some of your husband's concerns? What kind of concerns did you have?

: : We had discovered that we had a common interest in adoption before we even began dating.  So when fertility issues arose, it seemed like an obvious choice.  My husband was quicker to jump aboard the adoption train, but I think that's because fertility treatments would have involved some needles going in placed he had no interest in getting poked {here's a post about that}.  Our main concern was cost - how would we ever afford it?!  God blessed us with people who helped out financially, some part time jobs where we could earn extra money, and a family member who gave us an interest free loan until we get the tax credit money back.

Q:  I love the scripture in your tagline (it is one of the verses my 4 yr old has memorized).  What were some of the other scriptures you clung to during the wait?

: : Sometimes I wonder if I had the best attitude while waiting...I really clung to Psalms 20 and 103 which deal with God granting you the desires of your heart if you delight in Him.  At one point in my life, I was sure I never wanted children, but God changed my heart on that, so I held on to the fact that if He placed the desire on my heart to be a mom, He was going to fulfill it.

Q:  I noticed that you are a scrapbooker (me too!), how much of your adoption story do you plan on including in your son's scrapbooks?  Will you include every detail, or an abbreviated version?

: : A lot of it!  I didn't go into the heart breaking weeks that unfolded during the beginning of his life, but I will tell him all about that someday.  All the happy things surrounding the adoption, including tons of pictures of his birth family are included.  Between the scrapbooks and my blog, he's going to get pretty much the whole story!

Q:  The relationship you have with your son's birth mom is beautiful.  What led you to choose open adoption?

: : Honestly, I'm not sure.  I think I was just so desperate for a baby, I was willing to broach any kind of openness situation.  However, the more I read about open adoption I realized what a healthy relationship it could be for birth mom and adoptee (and everyone else, too).  When I found the blog, Heart Cries, I was sold.  I realized I actually wanted an open adoption.  When Jen picked us, I don't think she intended for us to have as open of an adoption as we have, but it's beautifully unfolding.  We are facebook friends, live about 35 minutes apart, and invite each other to our children's birthday parties.  It is like we have a very special part of our extended family.

Q:  What are some of the blessings of open adoption?

: : Knowing that Levi will never have to wonder if anyone wanted him.  He'll always know he was loved, he will always know his first family.  The more people to love on my son, the better!  On the flip side, I love that open adoption gives Jen the opportunity to see Levi grow up and see how absolutely adored he is.  Also, open adoption is great for obvious reasons like health issues.  We found out his birth father is highly allergic to strawberries, and his birth mother has some dairy issues, so it's helped us watch out for those things in the food that we give Levi.  

Q:  What are some of the harder parts of open adoption?

: : The more I get to know my son's birth mother, the more I love her, and the more I ache for her over the decision she made.  I wrote a post about it {here}.

Q:  How do you decide how much of your life to share on your blog?

: : I try to be pretty transparent.  I have a hard time keeping anything in my own life "private."  If there's ever a question about whether or not I should share something on the blog, I run it by my husband.  He's got great discernment.  But honestly, the only things I've not written about in detail are those things which are nitty gritty and not edifying to anyone anyway.

Q:  When do you find time to blog?

: : I usually blog in the evenings.  Our computer is in the living room so I can blog while my husband watches TV and we are still "together."  I also get things done during Levi's naps.

1Q:  When (in the process) and how did you tell your families you were starting the adoption process?  What were their reactions?

: : Pretty much as soon as we decided to start looking into it.  Everyone was supportive but some were a little bit concerned about the potential emotional roller coaster.  I think most of those fears were actually realized when our adoption was temporarily disrupted, but in the long run, Levi's adoption has been a huge bonding point for our families.

1 comment:

Bumber's Bumblings said...

Loved both interviews! Look forward to following both of your blogs :)