I Will Carry Her

I was reading Dr. Joanne Cacciatore's blog the other day and found something that really touched my heart.  Dr. Cacciatore, like me, is a social worker by degree and, also like me, has a baby girl in heaven.  She founded the MISS Foundation after the loss of her daughter Cheyenne.  Dr. Cacciatore recently wrote about a discussion with a colleague that spurred research into fetal microchimerism and what she found is amazing.

She found that research suggests that when a woman gives birth, she receives, in exchange for her sacrifice, a gift of cells that remain behind and protect her for the rest of her life.  These cells, like stem cells, may help repair damage when she gets sick.  One study suggests that women carry fetal cells in their blood for many years.  What she has to say is so beautiful, I may cry again just thinking about it.  Cells from both of my babies are in my blood and may help save my life one day.  I will carry Shyla in my heart both symbolically and literally. As a matter of fact, in Dr. Cacciatore's words, "Every mother who has lost a child has within her cells that belonged to that son or daughter."  Like I said, AMAZING!

Shortly after reading this, I found the song you hear playing (if you have your speakers on).  It is a song written by Todd and Angie Smith as they walked through the loss of their daughter, Audrey.  With the realization that I quiet literally carry both my children in my body, these words struck a chord in my heart that is hard to describe.  So I will let the lyrics talk for me.  Take a minute to reflect on the wonders of science that God is allowing us to learn and appreciate the beauty of His creation.  Listen to the song and read the lyrics. 

I Will Carry You
Written by Todd and Angie Smith
Performed by Selah

There were photographs I wanted to take

Things I wanted to show you
Sing sweet lullabies, wipe your teary eyes
Who could love you like this?People say that I am brave but I’m not
Truth is I’m barely hanging on
But there’s a greater story
Written long before me
Because He loves you like this


So I will carry you
While your heart beats here
Long beyond the empty cradle
Through the coming years
I will carry you
All my life
And I will praise the One Who’s chosen me
To carry you


Such a short time
Such a long road
All this madness
But I know
That the silence
Has brought me to His voice


And He says…
I’ve shown her photographs of time beginning
Walked her through the parted seas
Angel lullabies, no more teary eyes
Who could love her like this?


I will carry you
While your heart beats here
Long beyond the empty cradle
Through the coming years
I will carry you
All your life
And I will praise the One Who’s chosen Me
To carry you